When you read the title of this blog do you say to yourself, “No, not me”? Or maybe your first reaction was to scroll right past this title. I get it because when we think of Mental Health a majority of the population believes that it means you are Mentally Ill. Come on you all know that is a false statement, Right? The reality is you don’t have to be someone who suffers mentally to be a Mental Health Warrior. Of course if you have been diagnosed with Mental Illness then you know you are a Mental Health Warrior in the true sense of the word. The answer to the question is that each and every one of us is a Mental Health Warrior.
In reality life can be a challenge in general. There are always bumps in the road and unexpected life experiences that can throw you off kilter. It usually is the events and emotions that we don’t plan on that turn our lives upside down the most. Are you starting to see the picture that We are All Mental Health Warriors? I knew that you could relate.
What I have learned is that a lot of the situations in life that are unexpected are also unavoidable. Don’t get me wrong we can all run away from our problems and issues. Truly, that is the easiest thing to do, complete denial. No matter how hard or fast that you run it all comes full circle. This is where your Mental Health Warrior steps up to the fight. Choosing the right weapon to fight with can be a challenge, The more of a Warrior that you become, makes it easier when you are in a battle with others or just yourself.
I personally have had a week! A week that it seems like I have had a lot of battles to fight. I am truly ready for a breather but not sure that I will get it. So how do I keep my head above water? The truth is it’s all about how I chose to look at it and cope with it. Sometimes it is very easy to use the tactic of avoidance. It puts it away so that you don’t have to deal with the drama. That always is a dead end route to take because our problems and issues won’t go away unless we face them like a Warrior.
I have had difficulty with this, as we all do. It is so easy not to tell someone how they have hurt you. It is easy to stuff our feelings with distractions. It is easy to say not now. Ahhhh, but this can be very dysfunctional. It can be very painful to have those difficult conversations with those that are important to us. It takes a Warrior to take it straight on.
I had two situations this week where I had to have those type of conversations. The kind that you have been stuffing your feelings and realize that no good is coming from it. In the end I had two very different outcomes. The first was with a friend. A friend that has been in my life a long time. Our issues basically came from some misunderstanding and hurt feelings. The sad part is our friendship fell apart. Neither one of us wanted the friendship to end but both of us just sat with our hurt feelings instead of confronting the issues. After a lot of tears and expressing ourselves to each other our meeting ended with love, admiration and realizing how much we meant to one another. Truly, such a positive outcome and we both walked away as Warriors. Through communication and being open to acknowledging our faults in the relationship our friendship is stronger for the better.
Sadly, this can’t always be the outcome. This week I also had to deal with another person in my life, that I have known my whole life. The back story is that they had been talking behind my back. I avoided dealing with it for a long time because I wanted to keep the peace in the family. However, the hurt and pain from hearing their words through others gets old very quickly. I dusted off my Warrior with this person and I utilized my best weapon, my words. I texted this person because I wanted them to hear my words before they could hang up on me or yell at me. Another lesson in coping with others is that you have to measure your audience. Meaning you have to know what will be the most productive way to express your feelings with them. I wrote how they haven’t been there for me and that it’s not just about me being there for them, Sadly, as of today I have not received a response. I took my Warrior out and the words were unable to be heard. What I take from this is that we all can put up the good fight but if others aren’t willing to receive we have done all we can do. I have a sense of release and a huge sense of empowerment. I stood up for myself and I wasn’t going to be bullied. Who knows, maybe eventually this person will be ready to talk. If not I realize that sometimes we have to let Toxic go even if they are family.
My last Warrior moment this week was that I had to attend a friends mother’s funeral. Let’s be real none of us want to attend a funeral and all that it entails. It was my first funeral since my dad passed away a year and a half ago. I really didn’t think about that as I was getting ready for the funeral until I was sitting there listening to the Rabbi speak. Ugh, yes I really had to hold my emotions in at that moment to focus on my friend and their grief. My Warrior was fighting hard. A true internal battle was going on. Where my Warrior really stepped in was later in the day. I could have stuffed my emotions and let the pain take its effect on me physically and mentally. I came home and sat with myself awhile. I decided to use my go to for processing my feelings and to allow my Inner Warrior to fight for me. I put my earbuds in and just listened to music and lyrics that help me through struggles and one of my favorites came soothingly through my earbuds. Miley Cyrus’s extremely inspirational song “The Climb.” Here are some of the lyrics.
MILEY CYRUS “THE CLIMB”
There’s always gonna be another mountain
I’m always gonna want make it move
Always gonna be an uphill battle
Sometimes I’m gonna have to lose
Ain’t about how fast I get there
Ain’t about what’s waiting on the other side
It’s the climb
I just truly love this song for all that it is. Our Personal Warrior is in all of us. If you haven’t seen this Warrior yet or they have been sleeping dormant, it is time to awaken your Inner Power. We can’t control how others will respond to our Warrior but it’s truly not about that. It’s about you going through the motions, the climb. Everything that it takes you to confront someone that is important to you, grief, toxic people and interpersonal dynamics is the climb. If we bring our Warrior out to take care of ourselves, to protect our Mental Health, it is an uphill battle but eventually you will get on the other side of your pain and struggles. Empowering yourself is working towards what is on the other side, to living a healthier you and improving your Mental Health.
If you are struggling with certain relationships or just inner struggles find your magic that gives you the weapon to be a Mental Health Warrior. I have many but Music is always my first go to. It is what works for me. What works for you? If you aren’t sure well then your work begins right now. Identify Coping Skills that will help you communicate your feelings to others or that can help you with what is going on inside your head. Instead of letting the pain, negative thoughts or anger control your brain, you take control with your own personal Mental Health Warrior.
POSITIVE THOUGHTS CREATE POSITIVE ENERGY
GO OUT AND EXPLORE ALL OF THE WIDE OPEN SPACES IN YOUR WORLD
CIAO, ALOHA, MAHALO AND MERCI
ILISE
