PERFECT TO ME by Anne-Marie
“Don’t feel like putting make up on my
cheeks
Do what I wanna
Love every single part of my body
Top to bottom
I’m not a supermodel from a magazine
MMH
I’m okay with not being perfect
“Cause that’s perfect to me…”
Lyrics from Anne-Marie’s song “Perfect to Me.” I assume by now you see the correlation between her lyrics and the title of this blog. Body image, probably has been around since Eve tasted the apple and she realized that she was naked and wanted to cover herself up. Meaning, that Body Image is deep rooted in our DNA. Body Image is how you see yourself in the mirror or how others you believe see you. Body Image changes with history and what society believes to be the perfect male, female, they or them. I believe it can be very cyclical throughout history. In Roman times a voluptuous women was considered healthy and what a beautiful wealthy women should look like. In the 1960’s Twiggy the female supermodel from London, England was what women aspired to look like. She was named the face of 1966 (Wikipedia) Twiggy was very thin with an androgynous look. Many women after she appeared on Vogue magazine began to style themselves like Twiggy, even down to their weight and the way they looked in clothes.
In the 1980’s when I was growing up, having a small frame was what an attractive female should look like. Tight Jordache or Sergio Valente Jeans, that emphasized small hips, rear and thighs. Trust me it was not easy getting into those jeans when you naturally had wide hips, larger thighs and a rear. It was every girls dream to be thin like what we would see in movies on the big screen. This is when diet pills and taking laxatives to lose weight really became a rage amongst girls that I knew and in society. Time moves on and like everything, body images change with the passing of time.
In the 2000’s we started to see more plus size women shops in the malls and many online stores started to sell these sizes as well. I think in most recent memory the biggest change was when Victoria Secret stores started to carry athleisure, pj’s, bras, underwear and swimwear in larger sizes. The stores even have plus size mannequins in their store displays. As a plus size women myself, I know I started to feel more accepted and that my body was not so abnormal. According to Teen Vogue, “Most women in the world are plus size but only 2% of the images in the media are of plus size women.” So for the girl who still wants to fit into the skinny world there is still a lot of pressure.
I am no stranger to struggles with my body image. I was never a Twiggy and most of my life my weight has been up and down. I want to focus on the impact of social media and body image. I really thought the days of taking laxatives to lose weight were gone or only a small percentage of people dabbled in it. I guess like most things in history everything comes full circle and the laxative craze is back. However, I believe it is even more dangerous then in the 1980’s. My goal today is to make you my reader, sisters, brothers, mothers, fathers and friends aware of the pitfalls of what social media can create when it comes to body image. According to Media Smarts, “50% of ads found in teen magazines use sexualized beauty to sell products.” I believe that this gives an individual the mindset that a persons beauty is defined by looking and acting a certain way. This can lead to many different types of mental health issues.
Yesterday, I learned of a new social media craze that I think everyone should be aware of. Females and males of all ages through social media are being encouraged to lose that extra weight. The scary part is they are chronicling their weight loss journeys on social media. The big trend is look how fast I can lose weight when I take Laxatives. The videos show girls, boys, women and men on how big their clothes can get in just weeks by taking laxatives. I personally saw a social media account where the girl had her larger sized pants on, pulled them at the waist to show how much weight she lost in a short time. I also know that the biggest craze today is taking that once a week shot that makes you lose your appetite and you begin to lose weight quickly. There are many social media accounts spreading this message. I know women who spend hundreds of dollars a month taking these shots to lose weight fast.
Here is why I am scared. Eating Disorders and Body Image are as old as the dawn of time. At one time we made a lot of headway getting out the message of a healthy body image. These habits included, healthy ways to drop some pounds and going the old natural way of dietary changes. I am petrified of this new social media trend. This makes it available at anyones finger tips, the chance of being exposed to these videos. The trends and then algorithms, pop up on your feed and you begin to get all kinds of dieting information. The mind is bombarded with articles and the message that you are not thin enough. This gets the ball rolling on the abuse of laxatives, diet pills, shots, bulimia and anorexia nervosa. There are many other sub categories of eating disorders that I have not listed here.
The question is how do we counter program all of this information that we are being fed through our smart phones and social media apps? If you are a parent it just adds another pressure of being concerned of what our youth are being exposed to on these platforms. I know this is hard because it has been hard for me as a parent. At what age are they allowed to get cell phones, at what age do they have access to the internet? There are so many societal pressures that the kids are getting phones and exploring the internet, younger and younger. So first you must become the social media police with your kids, to see what kind of information they are absorbing. It sucks and we don’t want to create difficulties with our kids but we must be proactive. Maybe instead of just taking their phones away, there are parental controls, apps that let you see your child’s texts and internet activity. This way you are acting behind the scenes as well.
Proactive actions you can take to combat this unhealthy messages about body image is: sit and watch with the individuals you are concerned about healthy programming that shows the importance of people being all different shapes and sizes. I remember when the television show “This is Us” aired. The storyline gave way to everyday people and their struggles with weight and how to embrace who they are. If you are concerned about your younger child watch television that has content that does not sexualize female or male bodies, has a diverse cast and talks about embracing the body and who they are. I know this might take some research on your part but we must counter program what our youth watch to help us fight against these social media crazes. As a parent, be a good role model for your child regarding your own body image, make exercise not seem like exercise, don’t count calories around your youth, try not to talk about yourself dieting, embrace your youths attributes and focus on living a healthy life style. As parents we all want our children to be healthy but we must be mindful how we instill this message in our youth.
BEAUTIFUL FLOWER by India Arie
When you believe in you, who are beautiful
Yeah, you who are brilliant
Yeah, you who are powerful
Yeah, you who are resilient
This is a song for every girl who
Feels that she is not special
‘Cause she don’t look like a supermodel Coke Bottle
The next time the radio tells you to shake your moneymaker
Shake your head and tell them, tell them you’re a leader
I am now talking to you, my reader, who clicked on this blog because of the title, Social Media and Body Image. Most of us have some distortion of the way our bodies look. We think we look bigger in our clothes then we actually do. We take a million selfies trying to get that look where our faces look thin. Try on styles of clothing that might not enhance our body shape all because we saw some famous person on tv wearing it. The beauty of the human body is that we all come in different shapes and sizes. It is time to work on embracing you and to not fall into the algorithm of googling diets, quick ways to lose weight etc. You can make social media work for you if you limit what you watch and what you search. As you can see I love music and analyzing the lyrics to songs, as I have with the above lyrics. I have a challenge for you! When you struggle with your body image or are exposed to social media that triggers your weight issues create a music playlist. This is your way to counter program the harmful information that you are absorbing from social media. Challenge yourself to create a list of songs called your, “Body Positive” song list. Do some research and formulate a list of songs that you can play to help you get through those self-destructive thoughts that were ignited by watching social media. I believe Music to have magic powers, however, according to science, music can also decrease your anxiety levels, help you to break bad habits, instill the message that you are not alone and to see ourselves in a different light. Music is also very thought provoking. Having your “Body Positivity” song list can be a wonderful coping mechanism for you or the people in your lives and help decrease negative self-talk.
I will leave you with a couple of song titles that you can listen to that encourage positive body image.
BORN THIS WAY by Lady Gaga
GOOD AS HELL by Lizzo
F**KING PERFECT by P!NK
Social Media is here to stay and will continue to evolve in all the right and wrong ways that are possible. It is time to put yourself back at the drivers seat and not let Social Media influence or alter the way in which you see and feel about yourself. Nothing in life comes easy and we must all put in the trying effort to create a healthy lifestyle and mindset in each of our personal worlds.
POSITIVE THOUGHTS CREATE POSITIVE ENERGY
GO OUT AND EXPLORE ALL OF THE WIDE OPEN SPACES IN YOUR WORLD
CIAO
ILISE
