I don’t know about you but my head just spins from all of the interpersonal conflict I see and hear among friends, family, strangers and society. It’s like everybody’s tempers are on fleek. Red faces, screaming, physical fights and even destroying personal and public property. The anxiety level among society is in high gear. For a time I thought it was just in the United States but then as I watched national news the tempers were flaring around the world. I don’t mean wars, I mean interpersonal communication. Sometimes I just find myself shaking my head at the television or the computer screen. Literally, dumb founded by what I am seeing on the screen. Come on you all have seen and heard what I am talking about. Just this year alone tempers are elevated and sometimes down right scary. Where do you find yourself in all of this chaos? Do you see yourself as an observer, fighter, peace maker, agitator or avoider?
I want you to dig deep and be truly honest with yourself. How do you respond to communication conflict? Is your conflict handled differently when you deal with family and friends? The reality is we don’t get to pick our families but we sure as heck get to pick our friends and who we associate with. It is so important to have open communication with all of the relationships that we have in our lives. Conflict resolution is an important coping skill for you to work on to improve your communication style with others. There is a lot that goes into conflict resolution such as good eye contact, using I statements, body language, listening and not talking over others. Using statements like, ” I hear what you are saying,” “I hear where you are coming from” or ” I am hearing you.” Another good technique is to repeat back what they just said to you. The biggest and hardest part of conflict resolution is to maintain a proper demeanor and temper. If you start to yell, lash out or start to get physical the conflict resolution has taken a wrong turn. Realistically, conflict resolution takes a lot of practice, work and self control. We all have the skills to handle a communication conflict well but it does take a lot of thought and thinking before you speak.
The rhetoric has been amped up during this global pandemic. Tempers are high and people seem to become agitated very easily. If you see this in yourself I hope that you start to identify that you need a change in your communication skills. Each of us is a work in progress and nobody has perfected this coping skill. I believe that in every communication conflict we must do a lot of self talk as we are interacting with others. When you watch the news are you one of those people yelling and screaming about the topic of masks, vaccines, social distancing and mandates? I get it, we all have our own individual opinions and passions but the key is how do we get our point across to the opposing side? I watch the people yelling, screaming and throwing things at others and I just scratch my head. I ask myself was society always like this, so angry and confrontational. I don’t think I have the answer to that question yet but I am determined to find out. This is part of my journey in understanding others. We can’t always be the peacemakers but we can listen, talk respectfully and acknowledge others opinions or points of view. It is most important when you are dealing with family. Family needs to stay together and you must work through your differences appropriately to keep things copasetic in the family dynamic. Friends are a whole other ball game. If you have tried all of your coping skills and you still can’t see each others sides then maybe it’s time to part ways. Yes, parting ways is sometimes the only option in toxic relationships.
Episode 58 of my podcast discusses some of my personal experiences and experiences that I have witnessed in my years as a professional. I believe that by sharing these instances my listeners will be able to relate and might gain insight on how to repair a relationship. Ultimately, life is short and relationships are key to our happiness and productivity. So “Let’s Fight” appropriately by going to our own individual corners, maintaining eye contact, listening, exhibiting good body language and verbalizing that you hear what your opponent is saying. Tap your boxing gloves together as the bell rings and come out of this communication conflict at peace with your friend or family. I challenge you to listen to this weeks podcast “Let’s Fight” to work on your own conflict resolution with others. Growth in our relationships can only enhance our lives and make our relationships more productive, fun and worth while.
POSITIVE THOUGHTS CREATE POSITIVE ENERGY
GO OUT AND EXPLORE ALL OF THE WIDE OPEN SPACES IN YOUR WORLD
OCTOBER IS BREAST CANCER AWARENESS MONTH- check out Not My Daughter Find a Cure Now. Go to their FB page and like it. There will be a live telethon on October 25th where you can see me and others live as we raise money, entertain and educate our audience on breast cancer and breast cancer research.
CIAO
Ilise
